I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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