People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
