Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I cockslap morals
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
