I hope mine doesn't look like that
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize