Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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