This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
