I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
