Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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