We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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