I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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