i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
