I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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