I think I died a long time ago.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
