you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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