standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
