Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Randomize
