OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
