i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
