brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
