Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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