have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
