so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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