So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
