You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Two words: blizzard sex
Randomize
