Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
