and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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