I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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