She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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