Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
