with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
