The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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