Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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