Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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