I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
