quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
