If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Randomize
