your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize