Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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