member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I think your dad took our porno
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
