i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
