Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
