So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
