it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
