just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
