listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
