I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
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