I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Life is so much better after having sex.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize