he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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