I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
