did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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