I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
