Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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