They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
