Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
